We are still being killed.

“A massacre at an Orlando gay nightclub early Sunday morning has been described as a “domestic terror incident” with at least 50 dead and 53 injured, officials said, making it the worst mass shooting in U.S. history and the deadliest terror attack on U.S. soil since the events of Sept. 11, 2001.” (x)

If you don’t think LGBTQ people are still at risk just because we are allowed to marry, you haven’t been paying attention. This is the DEADLIEST terror attack since 9/11, and it specifically targeted people of the LGBT community. This massacre didn’t happen in some foreign country. It didn’t happen in a place you consider “backwards” or “regressed.” This happened HERE.

The other day, I had someone ask me, “What’s it like moving around in the world as a lesbian?”

This is what it’s like. It’s fear. It’s suspicion. It’s not knowing who you can trust and who you need to hide from.

I am very out and very proud — but I still have to make decisions every day about who I come out to, what language I use, and who I associate with. If I’m telling a story, I have to decide if I say it’s about my “girlfriend” or my “friend.” When someone asks me if I have a boyfriend, I have to decide if I’m going to correct them or just say “no.” If someone says something hurtful or hate-filled, I have to decide whether I feel safe enough to say something or if I have to keep my mouth shut.

This is constant. In any interaction, these decisions are being made. I am assessing my safety. I am deciding if this person will try to hurt me — physically, emotionally, sexually — if I tell them this. Because people think you’re disgusting or you’re sick or you need to be fixed. And that’s just wrong.